God You are so in tuned to everything. Lord You are not condemning but You are gentle and just in Your conviction. You alone God are what we are longing for. Everyday we try to figure things out without You, yet You patiently wait to just pour Your love on us as we have already been forgiven by the cross on Calvary. Lord on that cross You took on sickness, brokenness, barrenness, unrighteousness, betrayal, deception, loneliness, stress, and so much more. You were sinless and You fulfilled the law that showed us that we could never properly live this life on our own because we will always hurt the three: You, ourselves, and others. Oh but as we keep Your words and obey Your commands In our heart every moment at any given moment, we will love the three: You, ourselves, and others. Lord last night Mommy was talking about tests and the tests we have to take to mature and grow in You. Lord Your tests at not pass or fail. Your test Father God are love or hurt. Because if we do as You ask we will love. But when we don’t follow Your words, we hurt. We want to love. We choose to love. When we do hurt, Precious Savior, please open our hearts and mind to make it better. Also King, help us to follow You the first time. As we follow You, we will be showing other people You. Lord we want You to shine and be glorified because then we will be like You and the relationship Your have with the Father. As it says in John 8:54 “Jesus replied, ‘If I glorify myself, my glory means nothing. My Father, whom you claim as your God, is the one who glorifies me.'”(John 8:54 NIV) Now Adoni, we will worship You in spirit and in truth because you are worthy of every praise we have. Even the praises we are given we give back to You because we are glorifying Your name in all things. How we love You because You love us! Wow, You are lovely! Oh, the power of Your hand. Pow, Your wisdom puts fools to shame. This is why we trust in You! And You are so sweet because in the processes You walk with us and trust with us. You lower, humble and make Yourself meek so we can get closer to You! Bam, we will thank You for all that You’ve done whither specific or in general. Thank You Lord!!! In Jesus name we pray, Amen.
Here it is day 5 of the fast. I have to report of day 4’s events.
I had a craving for a Smoothie King smoothie. I know they are acceptable because they are healthy made from real fruit with high protein all good stuff. (Or I made them acceptable.) Anyhow, God was telling me to not go there but I wanted to go. After talking to my parents, they wanted some as well. So I was about to spend a good $35 in this place.
On my way over, I had a conversation with my mom. Sometimes I just want to get off the phone for a second because I need to gather my thoughts to fulfill the tasks at hand especially when I’m sleepy or even more so HUNGRY. So we finally hung up. I got out of the car with only two things: my money and my phone. Closed the door. Realized I don’t have my key. Went back to the car to find it locked.
I praised my Savior that my cell was in my hand. Called my parents back. Got the number for AAA. Went inside and ordered my smoothies. I had to stay in that place for 45 mins like a weirdo waiting for AAA.
Here was my inside key. While I was waiting I was texting Tati. It was refreshing to talk to her about some nonsense while I felt embarrassed as I stood there waiting for car service. I called my bestie, Janelle at her job, and let her know the situation. She was there for me and told me to text her when I was ok. As soon as I started my car, Nelly called me asking me if I was in my car yet because she was about to get off the job. I told her I just started the car and thanked her greatly for calling back to check on me.
For me in these moments their support and care was soo huge. So then I asked Tati if she was still coming over and she said she was contemplating it. Here is when my fight had to come. The stronghold of insignificance said “see your not important to her”. I stopped that and said “but is that what she said? No she said she was contemplating her coming. If I were not important she would even be contemplating it.” We had this little argument a few times over until the thoughts that would have made me feel small and sever our relationship went away.
Besides she was there with me when I needed her most. Through her God was loving on me in a cool way. I am important. God is glorious. He calls me beloved and means it too. I can fight the good fight and I am because the key is inside, for greater is He that is in me than he that is in the world.
Today is the first day of our, my church’s, 21 day fast. The theme of the fast is breaking strongholds. For the sake of today’s blog, I’m going to change the word from breaking to pulling.
This morning we were encouraged with wise words as they fell like the dew in the morning from Pastor Paul’s mouth.
Ah speaking of mouths, wisdom, and as aforementioned pulling, I got my wisdom tooth pulled OUT.
Can you believe this experience taught me about strongholds?
1. Only someone who knows what they are doing will be able to comfort you properly, before, during and after the procedure.
2. You as the patient have to trust the One doing the surgical work.
3. Now that the damage is done you are in charge of how quickly you recover by following the post surgical instructions. (You can cry about it or you can continue to live life with it bandaged for a while.)
4. The area feels weird, empty, and like something is missing.
5. You don’t want to eat because it’s not as natural feeling as it once was.
6. Talking is at it’s minimum. Praying for a speedy recovery is at it’s max.
7. You know when all the weird feelings and bleeding go away, you know it’s for your best and all things will work together for good in the end.
8. A renewal of you begins without that which was once rooted.
I don’t know if you can see what I am seeing. If so I think it’s not a bad way yo look at strongholds coming down. You’ll hear the cracking, then see the problem, then feel it’s effects for a little while, but finally be FREE.
God, You kept me alive for this day! Wow! Thank You. You are gracious and kind. I can only praise Your name for this goodness You have bestowed. Yet in the same token, it must mean I have something to give or something to receive on this day. Lord I want to give Your love and receive the same. Father, today could be all that I have. You could be preparing for me to meet You sometime this day. I must live fully because YOLO. I must stop my flesh and no even so I must kill my flesh! Can You help me? It might be painful. But my eyes are on the Resurrected One. Yes Jesus, You died and rose again! Lord. Jesus. I am sure that hurt. So if my flesh must die then let it because I know I will rise in Christ with Christ. Let my sacrifice cost me something so it may be why You kept me living for this day. Thank You. 😌
Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (I Thessalonians 5:16-18 NKJV)
This is the will of God. The will of God is for me to rejoice to be joyful over and over. The will of God is for me to pray unceasingly to always be in communication with my Father. The will of God is for me to give thanks in everything to just be grateful beyond my situation. That seems so simple. God help me to live in Your will. It’s in three parts and seems possible. Can we make this a goal for my 25th year of living to live out this verse: joy, prayer, and gratefulness! Yes, Lord! Thank You, Jesus (it’s starting already).
I see you
You see me seeing you
You are not appalled by me
I need to be bold and say something
I need to say something to you
You will see me differently
You and I no more pantomime
I talk to you
Dear Heavenly Father,
Please continue to be my guide and king! I love you so much. I ask that you take my doubts and fears when it comes to talking to someone I am attracted to and exchange them with hopes and confidence. I appreciate You listening.
It makes sense
Complete and full sense
…that I have been having a hard time moving on
In reality you did too
No, I’m not in love with you
But I do love you
For each other we may not be right
But we have made our souls tight
We spent time together
Go upset yet still leaned on each other
Like magnets we attracted
No matter how much time came between us our connection just got stronger
But I have to cut this cord.
This way I can move on to the next song and learn a new verse
It makes sense when they say you will never forget your first love
For I did love you but…we are not in love